Posted by | Madison | in Weekly Recaps, Playoffs

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If I was partying like a 20-year old co-ed on spring break last week, I’m not sure how to describe what happened last night. Here’s what I remember:

The Chargers played the Patriots hard. They had their opportunities. Four times into the red zone and they came away with four field goals. Early in the game, the field goals made sense but in the second half, on those 4th-and-1’s near the goal line, the Chargers should have to gone for it. You can’t expect to stay close to the Patriots in hopes of sneaking by them at the end. In all of their close games, the Patriots have shown an uncanny ability to close games out. The only way to not get closed out on the losing end is to be ahead by a touchdown or two. This, if nothing else, is crystal clear proof that Norv Turner disease is still uncured and still terribly deadly. I assert that if Turner had played with some stones, the Chargers would have pulled off the upset of the century.

And then, in what might have been the Game of the Century, THE GIANTS WON THE NFC CHAMPIONSHIP AND ARE IN THE SUPER BOWL! This has gone way better than I predicted.

What a great game, that swung back and forth, all the way into overtime. The emotional swings - holy crap - I almost chewed a hole in my Jason Sehorn (hotness!) jersey by the middle of the 4th quarter.

Suffice it to say, Big Blue was the better team on that cold ass field yesterday. They moved the ball efficiently against a good Green Bay defense and while they didn’t always come away with points, they made catches when they had to and didn’t make the dumb mental errors that they’ve always been known for.

Like a good boy, Eli kept his manhood at second base and didn’t try to do too much. Thank god.

Manhood awaits, Eli. Don’t rush it. Don’t too eager at third base and then on your way to home plate, keep it slow and steady. I know the buildup will make you crazy but stay within yourself. I don’t know if your dad, Coop, or Peyton have told you but it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion in the ocean.

When it finally happens and you attain your manhood when you lead The Giants to beat the Patriots 26-21 in the Super Bowl in two weeks, you will have earned the manly right to scream, “Atari, bitches! Skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet!

Anyway, if I acted inappropriately to any guys or Packer fans last night, I apologize. I’m not myself when THE GIANTS MAKE IT INTO THE SUPER BOWL!

Now back to sleep to nurse this nasty hangover…

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Posted by | Madison | in Playoffs

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I had plans to write previews of each team leading up to tomorrow’s game but I just couldn’t decide which angle to take.  First, I don’t find anything interesting about the Chargers getting rolled by the Patriots and second, I just can’t get my hopes up for a Giants victory tomorrow.

As a fan and a bloggerix, this puts me in a bind, and being the avoidant coper that I am, that’s why there was radio silence from me through the week.  But alas, I will do my best but it’s only because I know you all depend on me.

San Diego at New England: The Bolts’ surprising run in the playoffs has even turned the O.G. Norv Turner hater, writing that he owes Turner an apology.  Pussy.   Just because you had The Clap and you took care of it shouldn’t excuse your risky, hooker ass behavior for contracting The Clap.

So while the conventional wisdom on Norval has shifted because he’s in the Championship game, Norv is useless in my book.  He inherited a very talented team, took them to the brink of disaster, was blessed to play in a weak division, played a weak Wild Card opponent, was blessed - again - to play the Choking Colts in the Divisional Round, and has now made it one game away from the Super Bowl not because of him but in spite of him.

Dumb fucking luck.

And, as the captain of the Hatetriots, dumb fucking luck is exactly what I am hoping will strike on Sunday and lift the Chargers to the Super Bowl.

Can you imagine it?  Norv Turner.  Fucking Patient Zero for the Coaching STD, leading Billy Volek, Michael Turner, and a dinged up crew into Gillette Stadium and beating Bill Belichick, and his football playing savants.  Massachusetts just might spontaneously explode.

If you are a moral person, you will be rooting for the Chargers on Sunday.

Prediction: Chargers 28, Patriots 27

New York Giants at Green Bay:  I’m sort of stuck in a bind here.  I, of course, want the Giants in the Super Bowl but I think that the Packers match up better to beat the Patriots if they actually are able to muster the giddy-up to roll the Chargers in the early game.  Plus, I don’t want my Giants to have the dubious distinction of being the team that lost to the Pats for their 16th win AND also lose to the Pats for their 19th win.

This has sort of been a dream season for us: Championship game, Eli has graduated into being a fairly decent game manager, the running game and the pass rush are both solid and I don’t want to see it end.

However, I think there is a moral responsibility for a team to beat the Patriots.  Now maybe, maybe the Giants will be able to do it.  They almost did it once.  But for me, that’s a little too much to chance.  You see, I’m a little too scarred from the 2001 Super Bowl when Big Blue lost to the Ravens.  I had to go into rehab.

So, depending on who wins the early game, I’ll either be rooting for the Giants or the Packers.  I know, it’s mercenary of me.  How can I be a true fan, you ask?

You spend a week in a strait jacket in the lady’s wing of the Mid-Hudson Mental Hygiene Center and you’ll catch my drift.

Too soon…too soon.

Prediction: If the Bolts win - Giants 31, Packers 28; If the Pats win - Giants 31, Packers 35 

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Posted by | Madison | in Weekly Recaps

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The Packers, Cowboys and Seahawks clamped the chastity belts on their respective divisions today.

The Patriots did it back in Week 12.  Things are still up in the air everywhere else to varying degrees.  Tampa Bay will likely win the NFC South.  The JV Patriots are making things fun in the AFC North and though the Colts should be closing the legs of the AFC South, the Jags still have an outside shot of sticking it in.

And Chargers look to close out the AFC West before the NFL decides that it is not in the business of running a free clinic and just nukes the entire division to stop the spread of whatever ill ass STDs fermenting out there.

Chicago 16, Washington 24: A messy, messy game in Washington that looked more like an episode of ER meets the Keystone cops.  Chicago fans can rest easy now that the second coming of Sexy Rexy is over, again.  Not that this win assuages any of the feelings of the loss in the Redskins family but considering the emotional roller coaster of the past two weeks, it must feel nice.

Tampa Bay 14, Houston 28:  The first time I heard the name Sage Rosenfels being bandied about, I thought he was a she and that she was one of those hippie, Birkenstock wearing chicks that I always want to slap the shit out of for their tie dyed, patchouli smelling, ratty haired nastiness.  I mean seriously, would it kill your convictions to take a fucking bath, buy some clothes that fit and traded in those nasty ass Birkenstocks for a nice ballet flat?  Sage fucking Rosenfels.

Oakland 7, Green Bay 38:  Judging by the close calls that the Pats have with Baltimore and Philly, I think the Packers have the best shot of beating the Patriots in the Super Bowl.

Dallas 28, Detroit 27:  It actually seemed like the Lions would keep hope alive on Jon Kitna’s entrance to the Psychic Friends Network.  Unfortunately Kitna’s own teammate Jason Hanson missed a 35-yard field goal to stab the impossible dream in the heart.  However, it wasn’t until unsympathetic cutie Tony Romo pulled a Tom Brady Joe Montana at the end of the game to officially end Kitna’s quest for prognosticator immortality and likely the playoffs.  Mike Martz called a balance offense and still lost.

bnbrock2qc2.gifSt. Louis 10, Cincinnati 19:  This is how bad it’s gotten for the Rams - their starting quarterback has a name fit for a porn star.  Brock Berlin did not do too badly in his first show as the stud.  He rammed and got rammed, studiously and diligently I might add, but when it came time for the money shot, he had nothing.  Carson Palmer didn’t have a whole lot either but as the crafty veteran that he is, he was able to squeeze out just enough for the win.  Ewww.

Miami 17, Buffalo 38:  Shame on you Dick Jauron for running up the score on the Dolphins.  You know it doesn’t help you in the playoff hunt, Dick.  You could have beaten the Dolphins 24-17 and you’d still have as long of a shot as you have now.

San Diego 23, Tennessee 17 (OT):  Uncle Rico’s usually unbeatable ugly stat line (13-21. 121 yards 0 TDs and 2 INTs) got beat by the NTD riddled Chargers.  Luckily for the Bolts, Norv Turner Disease went into remission late in the 4th quarter and Albert Haynesworth got tired and dinged up.

Giants 16, Philadelphia 13: 
I know, a win is a win but I just cringe as I project forward for the Giants.  If they back into the playoffs again, they’re just going to lose their wild card game.  It’s like fucking clockwork and it kills me.

Carolina 6, Jacksonville: 37:
Vinny Testaverde must have forgotten to take his Ensure before suiting up for the game.

Arizona 21, Seattle 42:  So the Seahawks rolled over the Cardinals to sew up the NFC West.  Whoopdie doo.  If they had clinched the AFC East today, I’d be really impressed.  Shaun Alexander still makes me vomit spontaneously and I still think that as an organization, they don’t have heart.

Minnesota 27, San Francisco 7:  The 49ers did the impossible and stopped Purple Jesus!  Unfortunately, they couldn’t stop their own suckiness nor Chester “The Molester (of the line of scrimmage)” Taylor.  Alex Smith might be a bust?  Feh.  The Niners have Shaun fucking Hill who burned it up today going 22 of 28 for 181 with a TD and a pick.  That’s like the best QB day all season for the Niners.

Cleveland 24, Jets 18:  That’s right, Jets, forget about the JV Pats.  You’ve got bigger fish to fry, namely the Varsity Pats next week.  You did your fact finding mission against the scout team and now you have a full week to implement your intel for the game.  I like your thinking Mangina.  If you can lead the Jets to a victory next week, you will once again be the Mangenius.

Kansas City 7, Denver 41:  The Broncos ran all over the Chiefs depleted defense.  Like no one saw that coming.

Pittsburgh 13, New England 34:  It was not a good day for prognosticators.  First the possibility of fulfilling Jon Kitna’s season long quest for 10 wins was dashed in the final seconds of the Cowboys Lions game, then Steelers safety Anthony Smith, who guaranteed a win against the Patriots,  got moded…er got his team fucked up the ass on national TV.  Don’t you know that the Patriots are like the Incredible Hulk?  You don’t want to get them mad.  You won’t like them when they’re mad.  You must go into the game having everybody think you have absolutely no chance and then play the toughest, most hard hitting game of your life.  For this reason, I predict that the Jets will beat the Pats next Sunday.  If not, then Dolphins will win their first game of the season against the Pats in two weeks.  If not that, then the Giants.  And if the Pats go 16-0, then I predict that they will not win the Super Bowl.  Hey, I said it was a bad day for prognosticators.  I didn’t say it was a bad year…

Indianapolis 44, Baltimore 20:  What a serious letdown for the Ravens.  They came within a few bizarre mulligans on Monday from defeating the Patriots and then on Sunday return to the field and just get killed by the Colts.  Heartbreaking.  You know what else is heartbreaking?  Craphonso Thorpe did not play for a second week in a row yet Devin Aromashodu caught a pass for 10 yards?  Is Crappy injured?  More to the point, Tony Dungy and Tom Moore must be smoking the wacky terbackey for not calling plays for Thorpe.  And even more to the point, Thorpe and Aromashodu should be gay together, adopt a kid and name him Crappy Aroma.

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Posted by | Madison | in Weekly Picks

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Alikat is busy getting ready to leave for a week in Hawaii, while the rest of us are stuck here in rainy, gloomy ass Los Angeles.

What a bitch.

And she phoned in her picks. I mean, literally, after she sat with the lines and her research, she actually phoned in her picks for me to post.

Haha. The jokes on her when she finds out that Colt Brennan will be in New York for the Heisman selection.

All lines from BetOnline at Noon on 12/7

OUR MONEY PICKS

1. Giants +2.5 @ Philadelphia: Alikat says that you should buy the .5 point to get the Giants at +3. I think you should buy 50 points to get the Giants at +52.5. Like Ripley said in Aliens, “It’s the only way to be sure.”

2. San Diego @ Tennessee (Even): The Chargers seem to have their Norv Turner Disease under control so Alikat says take the Chargers. If you live in Southern California and listen to ESPN Radio, you’ll hear that STD Norv Turner do a commercial for Chargers football. Every time I hear it, I need to take a shower.

3. Cleveland -3 @ Jets: Take the Browns -3. I agree.

4. Tampa Bay -3 @ Houston: Take the Bucs -3. Again, Alikat is a genius.
THE REST OF THE DAY’S GAMES

Carolina +10.5 at Jacksonville: Take Jacksonville at -10.5

Dallas -10.5 at Detroit: Take the Cowboys at -10.5

Miami +7 at Buffalo: She says take Buffalo at -7. Every now and again, Alikat asks me how I feel about a game, not that I know anything about sports betting. That being said, this is a game that I would stay away from.

Oakland +10.5 @ Green Bay: Alikat says take the Raiders at +10.5. My gut says that Yellow and Green Jesus (Ryan Grant) will run all over the Raiders defense.

St. Louis +7.5 @ Cincinnati: Take the Rams at +7.5

Arizona +7 @ Seattle: Take the Cardinals at +7

Minnesota -8.5 @ San Francisco: Take the Vikings at -8.5. Let me guess, the Vikings game plan is going to be give it to Adrian Peterson.

Pittsburgh +10 @ New England: Alikat says take the Patriots at -10. I say pick the Steelers to win outright. Or lose by 3.

Kansas City +6.5 @ Denver: Take Denver at -6.5. Personally, I’d stay the hell away from this game.

Indianapolis -9 @ Baltimore: Take the Colts at -9.

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Posted by | Alikat | in Weekly Picks

So I ended up being wrong on the Packers vs Cowboys game! All you sports betting freaks out there know it’s time for a little comeback this Sunday. The game did come pretty close to my totals prediction though and although he wasn’t playing very well at the beginning, Favre would have made a great comeback in the second half had he been healthy. I just don’t know what McCarthey was thinking with his play calling in the 1st and 2nd quarters. Too much bombs away and not enough of the short passing game that had been so successful for them the entire year. Oh well, it’s on to the Sunday Games!

Money Picks

1. Seahawks +3 @ Eagles

Just because the Eagles stayed with the Pats last Sunday Night doesn’t mean they’ve turned the corner as a team. They still have huge problems in the secondary and that was a once in a lifetime performance for A.J. Feeley. The Seahawks are playing up to their potential right now and I gotta feeling old Alexander just might want to show the NFL he’s still around. Baldy Matt will get it done in the 4th quarter so…

TAKE THE SEAHAWKS +3

2. Bucs +3 @ Saints

We still don’t know if Jeff Garcia is going to be able to play in this game due to his sore back. It’s sounding like he won’t and even if he does he’s not going to have the mobility that is his trademark. Luke McCown isn’t going to get it done and neither will Gradkowski. This is a MUST WIN Game for the Saints unless they want to start making travel plans for 2008.

TAKE THE SAINTS -3

3. Browns +1 @ Cardinals

The JV Patriots come into the Crazy Desert for a showdown with the inconsistent Cards. Boy did they blow that game last week against the 49ers. They are going to be missing S Adrian Wilson, which is a huge blow to their Defensive backend. He is to the Cards what Rodney Harrison is to the Patriots. They both bring the intensity and leadership that you just can’t measure on paper. The Browns have too many weapons for the Cards to handle and if they don’t drink the desert water on Saturday Night they will come out on top by a touchdown.

TAKE THE BROWNS +1

4. Jaguars +6.5 @ Colts

This game should be a good one with 1st place in the AFC South on the line. The Jags have been one of the most consistent teams in the league this year and Jack Del Rio would love to avenge that Monday Night Loss to the Colts earlier this year. The Colts are starting to get healthy again though and Peyton is due for a HUGE GAME. Hell, he watched how bad his brother played last week and figures somebody better uphold the Manning Name. This game will be close for 3 quarters and then I think Manning will put up some fast points and the Colts…

TAKE THE COLTS -6.5. If you see them at -7 either buy down the 1/2 point or PASS on this bet. They are -6.5 right now on betonline

5. Broncos -3.5 @ Raiders

The Broncos are in a Must Win situation going against another McCown, this time Josh. Why don’t we see the McCown Father all over TV like we do Archie Manning? Can anybody tell me where these kids came from? The Raiders can run the ball and the Broncos sure as hell can’t defend the run, but Shanahan will load up the box on these guys and make Josh beat them deep. We all know that’s not going to happen so here’s to Cutler having a great day and maybe we’ll finally get to see an appearance by Jamarcus Russell.

TAKE THE BRONCOS -3. Buy down the 1/2 point or take a risk with the -3.5 line. I really believe the Broncos will win this by a touchdown, but I tend to get a little conservative when I see that HOOK sitting there on a 3 point line, especially in a divisional rivalry game.

THE REST OF THE BUNCH

1. Falcons +3 @ Rams

Does anybody really care about this game outside Atlanta and St. Louis? They are both playing for next year or draft picks in 2008. The Rams have a healthy Stephen Jackson and the Falcons have Joey Harrington.

TAKE THE RAMS -3

2. Bills +6 @ Redskins

I’m not going to sanction Betting on This Game due to the tragedy of Sean Taylor’s Death. I hope the Redskins are able to come out and play well for their fallen teammate. It is going to be an emotional roller coaster for that organization over the next 48 hours. I wish them the best and my thoughts go out to the Taylor Family and the Redskin organization in their time of grief.

3. Lions +4 @ Vikings

Well it doesn’t look so hot for the Lions anymore does it Detroit Fans. I’ve been waiting for the clock to strike midnight on you guys. The Vikings are starting to get more and more Big Plays on Defense and T-Jack is playing better at QB. I just hope ‘Purple Jesus’ stays healthy tomorrow, we’re going to need him over the next decade. Kitna will get sacked at least 5 times tomorrow and the psychic friends network can wait another year until they hire ole Jonny Kitna.

TAKE THE VIKINGS -4

4. Texans +3.5 @ Titans

The Titans better get it going or a season that was looking pretty good only 3 weeks ago will be over faster than Pacman Jones can throw dollars at a stripper. It sounds like they are going to finally get Albert Haynesworth back tomorrow which should shore up their D-Line. The Texans can score quickly if Matt Schaub gets a little time so this game should be close. In the end Vince Young will make a play to save the season for the Titans!

TAKE THE TITANS -3.5

5. Jets +1.5 @ Dolphins

I really don’t have much to say about this game other than hopefully in a couple of years the 2 young QB’s in this game, John Beck for the Dolphins and Kellen Clemens for the Jets will be playing for a whole lot more than they will be on Sunday. The Mormon will get his first win…

TAKE THE DOLPHINS -1.5

6. Chargers -6 @ Chiefs

The Chargers never play well in Arrowhead stadium and now they have to do it with the dreaded Norv Turner STD. You at least get to take the Chiefs on with Damon Huard as their starting QB. The Chargers have been looking good on offense lately and the Chiefs couldn’t score if you gave them a bottle of tequila and a naked Britney Spears!

TAKE THE CHARGERS -6

7. 49ers +3 @ Panthers

The 49ers just might start making a little late season run here. I’m kidding! They did show some flashes of the team they were supposed to be last week in Arizona. If Frank Gore runs around like he did last week they will walk away with this game. The Panthers are just brutal right now and have yet to Win a Home game this year.

TAKE THE 49ERS +3

8. Giants -1.5 @ Bears

I sure hope for Eli’s sake that he has somewhat of a good game or else the N.Y. Post might just throw rocks at his car or some crazy shit! The Bears counter with Sexy Rexy. Man, if you could be a fly on the wall in the Dive Bars of Chicago and NYC tomorrow late afternoon! I would love to hear some of the Drunken Poems that come out of the mouths of die hard fans who have $100 bucks on either of these two QB’s! In the end I think the Giants pass rush will get to Rex, but then Devin Hester will probably find a way to score as a wide receiver since the Giants surely are smart enough to not kick it to him, right? You see where I’m going with this? Just watch this game and all the soap opera aspects to it without having to sweat the money, okay!

TAKE THE GIANTS -1.5. Only if you are a true Gambling Junkie should you play this game. It’s just too crazy!

9. Bengals +7 @ Steelers

The Bengals are starting to play much better as of late. Getting WR Chris Henry back has helped along with Chad Johnson finally finding the endzone again. I think this game will be close, but in the end I like the ability of the Steelers to run against a really mediocre linebacking crew of the Bengals.

TAKE THE STEELERS -7

So there you have it sports betting junkies. I’ll give you my Monday Night Pick on Monday afternoon. Have a great Sunday and we’ll talk soon!

Bet Ya–

ALIKAT

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Posted by | Alikat | in Weekly Picks

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So how’s the Thanksgiving Weekend treating all you sports betting freaks out there? Have you all seen some of the College Football Games this weekend. Amazing to say the least! In the past 2 days I have watched about 9 hours of SEC Football. On Friday you had Arkansas vs LSU, in a Marathon event, with the Razorbacks knocking off the #1 team in the country in 3 OT’s and then today the Volunteers take down the Kentucky Wildcats in 4 OT’s. You couldn’t pitch this stuff to a Movie Producer without getting laughed at. If Week 12 in the NFL is half as good as those 2 games I’ll be very happy. So, it’s late and of course I have drank way too much and had some delicious pumpkin cheesecake this weekend so I’ll be a little more brief in my breakdowns of the games tonight. Just remember we are already 1-0 in the Money Picks with the Packers covering on Turkey Day. So here we go. Remember all lines are from betonline.com as of 1am pacific time Sunday. Best of luck to you all!

Money Picks

1. Broncos +1.5 @ Bears

The Broncos are starting to look like the team everybody ‘Thought they were’ in the pre-season magazines. Sexy Rex will not be able to sling it like his counterpart Jay Cutler. The Bears are not consistent and the Broncos are getting their S… together.

TAKE THE BRONCOS +1.5

2. Texans +3 @ Browns

Should be a shootout. Probably will be something in-between. Either way I like what I’m seeing in the Browns Offense much more than what I see in the Texans Defense.

TAKE THE BROWNS -3

3. Seahawks -3 @ Rams

These games are supposed to be close, but the Seahawks are getting their act together now that Alexander isn’t around to foul things up. They need this Win to stay 1 game ahead of the Cards in the West. The Rams are getting healthy, but it’s too little too late.

TAKE THE SEAHAWKS -3

4. Saints -2 @ Panthers

This line was at -2.5 for the Saints and then you hear Old Vinny might not play due to a stiff back and the line goes down for the Saints, hmm? It doesn’t matter if Reggie Bush can’t play this Sunday. It really doesn’t freaks. This offense goes as Brees goes and he’ll go against the Panthers.

TAKE THE SAINTS -2

5. Redskins +3 @ Bucs

This game is tricky and I’m bucking the stats and the way the Bucs have been playing at home all year on this one. The Redskins are a few plays away from being 7-3 and Jason Campbell is starting to come of age. I know they are banged up right now, but these two teams always play close games and I’m going with the Dawg!

TAKE THE REDSKINS +3

THE REST OF THE BUNCH OF HOOLIGANS

1. Titans -1.5 @ Bengals

This game could make my Money Picks if I knew the status of DT Albert Haynesworth. We won’t know for sure until probably 20 minutes before game time. My hunch is he’ll play, but I’m waiting to hear before I play this game. If he does play I would go with the Titans as they are a completely different team with him in the line up. If he sits another one out I would go the other way and play on the Bengals. I know it sounds strange to put this much emphasis on one DT, but as he goes so goes the Titans defense.

WAIT FOR STATUS ON DT HAYNESWORTH AND PLAY ACCORDINGLY (See Above)

2. Bills +8.5 @ Jags

The Bills won’t have RB Lynch on their side. How in the hell are they going to score against the Jags without him? If the Jags don’t self-destruct, as they’ve been know to do, this game should be over by the start of the 4th quarter.

TAKE THE JAGS -8.5

3. Raiders +4.5 @ Chiefs

I guarantee you this won’t be half as exciting as the Missouri vs Kansas game played just 15 hours before or half as loud. Both the QB’s in this NFL affair would sit on the bench at Missouri with the way Chase Daniels plays the position. Remember that name Freaks, Chase Daniels will be an NFL Star someday soon. As for this one I see the Chiefs without Larry Johnson and I have to go with…

TAKE THE RAIDERS +4.5

4. Vikings +7 @ Giants

I hope to hell that ‘Crazy Childress’ keeps Peterson off the field for one more week. I don’t need to see that kind of talent wasted away on the field in NY over trying to save Childress’s Job. The Giants need this game badly to keep ahead in the Wildcard Hunt.

TAKE THE GIANTS -7

5. 49er’s +10 @ Cardinals

The Niners can’t do anything right now. The Cards are starting to ‘Believe’. Crazy things go on in the desert so I wouldn’t be shocked if this goes the other way in terms of Covers, but…

TAKE THE CARDS -10

6. Ravens +8.5 @ Chargers

The Ravens have been brutally bad on the road this season. The Chargers need this game if they are to stave off being completely taken over by ‘Norv Turner’s STD’! Problem is that Philip Rivers can’t seem to find anything he can READ that doesn’t involve wrong colored jerseys. If you Must Bet, and I mean Must Bet, cause you need something to sweat out from this weekend then by all means go ahead and play this game. Nobody has a clue who’s going to show up here, but…

TAKE THE CHARGERS -8.5

7. Eagles +24 @ Patriots

That’s not a misprint Guys and Gals. That’s not even a College Football Line. That’s a line in the NFL for the Sunday Night Special. Madden gets to gush over Tom Brady all over again. McNabb is out and A.J. Feeley is in at QB. Everything in me says take the points and go to sleep knowing you will be at the Bank on Monday Morning… Empty handed because of the Drive-By from BMH. BMH is the new name I’m giving for Brady-Moss-Harrison They are a 3 member gang from somewhere in the hills just south of Boston. Armed and extremely dangerous. One can Shoot, one can Fly, and One can Hit like a MOFO!

TAKE THE PATS

8. Dolphins +15.5 @ Steelers

This game sure does sound like a hangover from the weekend huh? Another bad Monday Night game. We’ve had far too many the past 3 weeks in my opinion. Maybe we’ll at least get to see a ‘New and Improved’ Ricky Williams if Jessie Chatman can’t heal up in time. Imagine if Ricky goes off the hook and the Mormon QB Beck throws a couple of TD’s. Now that could get entertaining for Kornheiser. A Weed Addict and a Mormon in the same backfield. I’m telling you you can’t write some of these crazy ass storylines.

TAKE THE STEELERS -15.5

So there you go! Enjoy your last day of the Long Ass Weekend and I’ll talk to you in a few days.

Bet Ya–

ALIKAT

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Posted by | Madison | in Links

turner.jpgLast week, our link theme was Lions.  This week, it’s dedicated to the very important task of ridding the earth of that coaching STD we know as Norv Turner.  It’s probably already too late in San Diego but he absolutely must be stopped. 

If you think that NTD doesn’t affect you, beware, your favorite team might be the next one to be crippled by this terrible, terrible disease.  Only together can we defeat NTD.

I know that “Norv Turner needs to be fired is a dead horse but it’s only a figurative dead horse since he is still coaching. 

So, with that said, figurative dead horse, meet figurative stick.   [Rumors and Rants]

And again. We won’t stop until the franchise killing Norv Turner Disease is eradicated.  [The Coach is Killing Me]

And again. [Fire Norv]

And again. [Oliver Willis]

And the stick connects all the way from San Francisco. [Niners Nation]

And finally, do something - sign a damn petition to get his ass fired [Online Petition

Derek Anderson, bitches.  I bet you the Ravens are wishing they kept JV Tom Brady instead of releasing him. [Larry Brown Sports]

Vote for the Sexiest Sportscaster.  We voted.  Wouldn’t you like to know who we would get frisky with if we were real sportscasters…and lesbians. [Awful Announcing]

Is this going to be Indianapolis’ Buffalo ‘66 moment? [Can’t Stop the Bleeding]

That’s right, Vinatieri missed and Jim Sorgi is just chillaxin’ because that’s what he does, but check out Peyton Manning who has turned into a brain eating zombie. [With Leather]

A the movies that should be given to NFL teams for Christmas. [Afraid of Ed Hochuli]

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