Posted by | Madison | in Weekly Recaps, Playoffs

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If I was partying like a 20-year old co-ed on spring break last week, I’m not sure how to describe what happened last night. Here’s what I remember:

The Chargers played the Patriots hard. They had their opportunities. Four times into the red zone and they came away with four field goals. Early in the game, the field goals made sense but in the second half, on those 4th-and-1’s near the goal line, the Chargers should have to gone for it. You can’t expect to stay close to the Patriots in hopes of sneaking by them at the end. In all of their close games, the Patriots have shown an uncanny ability to close games out. The only way to not get closed out on the losing end is to be ahead by a touchdown or two. This, if nothing else, is crystal clear proof that Norv Turner disease is still uncured and still terribly deadly. I assert that if Turner had played with some stones, the Chargers would have pulled off the upset of the century.

And then, in what might have been the Game of the Century, THE GIANTS WON THE NFC CHAMPIONSHIP AND ARE IN THE SUPER BOWL! This has gone way better than I predicted.

What a great game, that swung back and forth, all the way into overtime. The emotional swings - holy crap - I almost chewed a hole in my Jason Sehorn (hotness!) jersey by the middle of the 4th quarter.

Suffice it to say, Big Blue was the better team on that cold ass field yesterday. They moved the ball efficiently against a good Green Bay defense and while they didn’t always come away with points, they made catches when they had to and didn’t make the dumb mental errors that they’ve always been known for.

Like a good boy, Eli kept his manhood at second base and didn’t try to do too much. Thank god.

Manhood awaits, Eli. Don’t rush it. Don’t too eager at third base and then on your way to home plate, keep it slow and steady. I know the buildup will make you crazy but stay within yourself. I don’t know if your dad, Coop, or Peyton have told you but it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion in the ocean.

When it finally happens and you attain your manhood when you lead The Giants to beat the Patriots 26-21 in the Super Bowl in two weeks, you will have earned the manly right to scream, “Atari, bitches! Skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet!

Anyway, if I acted inappropriately to any guys or Packer fans last night, I apologize. I’m not myself when THE GIANTS MAKE IT INTO THE SUPER BOWL!

Now back to sleep to nurse this nasty hangover…

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1 Comment

1.

Comment by Educated Bet on 2008-01-22

Did you ever see Eli’s magic trick where he stops that watch just by looking at it?
Peace…Iron Mike


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